Rate the last film you watched .........2013

Hotel Transylvania

good fun for my girls & not bad for the adult viewer due to the occasional concealed adult joke.

7 garlic bulbs out of 10

 

Batman The Dark Knight Rises - long movie, should have been better 7 bats out of 10

Paranorman - waste of time 1 dead zombie out of 10

 

Twilight 8 blood clots out of 10

 

C0ckneys vs Zombies

Very funny film , the bloke who plays brick top in lock stock is on fine form!

8 out of 10

 

Skyfall - was a decent movie but lacked an edge 6 villains outta 10

Dark Knight Rises - too many things in it not right for me and it was too long. 6 outta 10

 

Dark Knight Rises. 6 out of 10.

Spoilers below:

There was so much positive hype that was about when this was in the Cinema and on the net, everyone raved about it, said it was an emotional rollercoaster, a fitting end to the series, but frankly I thought it was a bit slow, a bit long and the story isn't very exciting. Bane isn't a patch on The Joker, and dare I say it, the whole story is a bit depressing, there's none of the wit or fun of the previous two. Alfred is hardly in it; Gordon doesn't get much screen time ether. Catwomen and Robin are in it, but not really, they're sort of real world versions of themselves. Batman / Bruce Wayne is also reduced to a more 'real world' version. There's no triumphant end, it goes out with a whimper. It's not that it's a bad film, it's just not great.

Prometheus 7/10

Visually stunning, the choice of script / story is odd, seems they went out of their way to distance themselves from the Alien films as much as they possibly could, whilst keeping the studio happy by making it a sort of prequel. I think there will be a sequel that could be brilliant that needed this to set it up, but my biggest problem with it is, for an Alien film, it's not actually scary.

Jaws Bluray. 9/10.

Everyone knows the story. but it's been years since I've seen it and it looks stunning on Bluray, OK some of the effects really don't need seeing any clearer, the bad ones (basically anytime the shark leaves the water) just look worse in HD. But the film is still great, and my Son and I loved watching it, feet of the floor on our Sofa/Boat.

 

Life of Pi - i saw this at the cinema instead of jack reacher. what a crap movie 3 outta 10
Bourne Legacy- it took a little to get going but was good but not as good as the previous movies - 6 beaten men outta 10
The Wordwas ok to pass the time if nothing else - 4 out of 10

 

TED on dvd foe xmas,,,funny as foooooooooooooooooooook,

 

Red Tails 5/10

Really strange film tbh, it's a George Lucas joint and his finger prints are all over it but sadly it's more Phantom Menace than Empire Strikes Back and shares a lot of the same problems, it looks stunning, a little too shiny in the way his newer stuff looks, I guess there's not such thing as CGI dirt or grime, the story shows a group of Black Pilots in WW2 and it's meant to show the sort of discrimination they faced, and to a certain extent it does, but only when absolutely required, most of the time it's an exorcise in showing them just blowing everything else out of the sky or destroying any ground target with total ease, they seem to achieve this through the use of lasers or possibly magic bullets - take this for example:

SPOILERS FOLLOW:

About 3/4 the way through the film one of the pilots after shooting down a dozen or so enemy fighters spots a German Destroyer on the coast and decides to attack it with what ammo he has left, he fly’s directly at the ship on the broad side and they open up with all manner of massive weaponry, but not one of the million or so rounds they fire finds a target, he returns fire with his 6 .50 machine guns, no doubt formidable firepower against people or soft skinned vehicles but not much use against a large ship, thankfully someone has remembered to load the laser bullets because the ship goes up like a box of fireworks, he turns and strafes it again, we don't learn the fate of the ship, but every inch of its deck in engulfed in flame and explosion.

A few moments later in the film the same pilot decides to play a game of chicken with a German Ace / Squadron leader (this guy has form, he's the badest thing in the sky, but we'll forget they managed to shoot him down twice before with relative ease) so they square up face to face at a closing speed of about a trillion MPH (the German has a new fangled Jet plane) and open up, he destroys the German plane, but takes a few hits himself, lucky for him the Germans must have run out of laser bullets because he's hit in the torso about 6-8 times and manages to carry on for an hour or so before finally dying.

In short.

US bullets will destroy any target with a few shots, but are designed to do so in the more cinematic way possible - enemy planes, made out of wood and tin will take a short burst before smoking and slamming into the ground killing the pilot. UNLESS they're parked on the ground and unfueled, when they will explode and let 'Gerry; burn to death. However when they hit million tone iron ships they create explosions that engulf the entire deck, 80 tone steam trains are also destroyed with such a force that bits of it will fly to a 1000 feet and embed themselves in US planes, this however does not effect their performance in the slightest. They never drop a bomb - ever.

US planes have quite unbelievable survivability features, a pilot can be shot, covered in many gallons of fuel sloshing around the cockpit, crash in a huge rolling fireball over to land the right way up burnt, but despite the cockpit being basically a swimming pool of fuel, not dead, or indeed on fire.

The dialog also is just terrible, it's just so corny.

I gave it 5 out of ten because despite all this it's really watchable, and the talent is there, it's core of the B cast from The Wire bulked out with Cuba Gooding Jr but the story is a mess, major event happen with out much notice and minor ones are played to death, the script is cheesy and the 'message' is cringe worthy.

 

Ted i thought it was ok but its not my type of comedy - 5 out of 10

 

Quartet - funny, gentle, very English, great music 10/10

 

stand up guys 7/10 really liked the feel of the film and the colours it was shot in if you know what i mean? the titles were almost 70s cop show font. give it a watch

 

Killing Them Softly - started to watch it, 40 mins later I was bored due to too much talking and not enough action so switched it off - 2 out of 10

Savages - Good movie, a few littles twists - 8 savages out of 10

 

Dinner for Schmucks - I'm a Paul Rudd and Steve Carell fan, but if you're not, you probably won't make it to the end. Not that funny, the guy from flight of the conchords does a good turn and the french bird is hot, couple of laugh out loud moments towards the end and that's about it.

4 mice dioramas out of 10

Love and Other Drugs - Anne Hathaway wit her cans out a fair bit, those are the highlights lol, it's a 2hr film which seems stretched, could have gave more time to character development, seems a little flay in parts and then a mad rush towards the end, rom-com? mediocrity.

6 Viagra's out of 10

No Strings attached - similar to love and other drugs in that, main highlights are Natalie Portman frolicking around in minimal clothing, stretched and hashed out storyline with a mad dash to the finish of a classic rom-com plot, with an unengaging lead male.

4 girlfriend stealing father's out of 10

 

Dredd 3D (in 2D) 8/10 really liked this one, far better than that 'other one' I suspect it was made on a budget - the mega city looks like a current day city with a few huge futuristic towers CGI'd in, and it is - plus even though it's meant to be set 100 years from now (or something like that) the vehicles are 80's and 90's vintage, but when you get past some of these 'frills' it's very good - the main actor is a "oh what's his name" fav of mine, in fact all of the cast are good the main stay of the action is restricted to a small number of sets (probably for budgetary reasons) but it's a good story played well, hopefully it'll lead to a bigger budget sequal - just keep Sly from it.

Rock of Ages 7.3 / 10 I DIDN'T know it was a musical, in fact I knew nothing about it other than it scored quite well on Lovefilm and I was constantly being asked to add it to my list because I was low on titles, you've really got to be in the mood for a lot of singing, but it's great fun -If I could escape the fact I kept thinking it was very 'glee' or heaven forbid 'high school musical' I'd enjoy it more. Another rare role for Tom Cruise when he doesn't play an arsehole

 

when and why did they remake Rambo?

 

Lincoln - excellent film, especially if you're a history buff, like me. Daniel Day Lewis is always good. 9/10

 

Tron - loved the special effects and the story line was ok too - 7/10

 

Unless I've missed something I don't think they have Jon? They made a sequal few years back, it's ok-ish, but overly gory - it's a sort of 80's style video nasty, only in HD, it detracts from the story which I think is intentional because it's limited to say the least.

The Sweeney 2/10

Complete toss, totally unlikeable lead charactors who, despite being coppers are much bigger criminals tham the criminals they're trying to justify their actions to capture.

Margin call 7/10

Really well acted, I should add that the story is greatly enhanced for me because I was working in banking during the big crash and experianced some of the story first-hand, addmittedly in a much smaller capacity than the people in this, it also helps if you have an interest in economics and international investment banking, which isn't actually exciting subjects to most people I'd guess ha ha.

Total Recall 6.5 / 10

It's a remake, that's not really a remake, some of the concepts of the first one are there, but the story is quite different, and without Arnies cheesy one-liners and better effects it's better IMHO.

Ted 7/10

It's very funny, is it a live action Family Guy, well no, but some of the humor is the same, in some respects it's totally original, in others it really not, but it's a good laugh.

 

it was the way its just called Rambo that threw me, passed me by the first time.